When it comes to relationships with friends, family and partners, this is a discussion that comes up often I find.
Do opposites attract and does the opposite apply?
For example; I bicker a lot with my sister, (I’m 25 and really should know better)… my mum always says; “you’re too similar for your own good”. Are we? Is that why? Or have we just known each other for a really long time? Is it all just pseudoscience or is there some truth to it?
With friends, I can’t think of many who I would say are insanely similar to myself; about two… Possibly. However I think the similarity in those cases is what makes us click and is why we’re such good mateys.
In the realm of relationships the question that jumps to my mind is should you actively avoid them if the other person is too similar to you? I have always had the other thought in mind, but maybe I’m wrong.
What do we even mean when we say too similar?
Someone with a different set of interests could introduce you to a whole world of things you didn’t even know existed. Buuut similar interests are how you get connected to and start conversing with someone in the first place.
Beliefs is an interesting one. Again differences can be a good thing, introducing the other person to a whole new world (Aladdin is a great film). Bare in mind I don’t just mean solely religious, this category includes political, social, economical and so on…
This is a big one in relationships in particular, I think your partner has to match you in terms of drive. For friends and family; drive and aspirations is not as important I don’t think.
This is the big one, I’m not friends with my own bloody clone, but I bet he’s a proper laugh. Obviously I jest, I’ve actually had experiences that go both ways on this. I had one friend who was the polar opposite to me. I thought he was great and he dragged me out of my comfort zone to my own benefit. In time though it was actually the differences that made us drift apart.
What’s the answer then? Yes differences can be complimentary, but still I have no idea. I think that my pseudoscience shout might be spot on!
Is it just another silly myth like ‘can guys and girls be friends?’ or my ABSOLUTE least favourite ‘the friend zone’, which is just depressing that it exists as a thing. Where’s the evidence?
Anyway waffling over, if you have anything to say on the subject, I’d love to hear a more concise, considered argument.